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Rabu, 11 November 2015

One Day


To : You

Dear you...
I write these words for you.

Do you want to know what it feels
to stick with one person for six years?

Do you wany to know what it feels
to hide this love from people just because
you already know it won't work?

Do you want to know what it feels
to ignore the truth just because I love you?

Do you want to know? Or you you don't want to bear?

.................

Let's start with "One day".

One day that changed my life
One day that I learned to
cry and happy in same time
One day that I was so blessed
One day that I hope I didn't meet you
One day thay i feel so unwanted.


One day we met, we shared ideas, we laughed, we fell in love, we made love.

One day we know the world hates us
One day, we cursed norms, we cursed the ages between us, we cursed our lives.
We cursed God!

After that, we were still together.
We fought the distance
We fought the norms
We were hiding from people.

I didn't care.
Because we did it together
At least I thought so.

From year to years, believe was the only one we shared.
From year to years, we madr new memories.
From year to years, we loved the situation.

Till now
I see your pic with the other girl.
Yes, I said it! She is just a girl. I dont blame her. I blame you.

You made her feelings to write how happy she was with you. Implicitly! There is hope in her writings. There is love in her situation.

I can not blame her for havibg it. If i blamed her it means I blamed myself. Because she is just like my mirror, six years ago. How can you make this girl in the same situation like me?

Do you want to know what it feels to realize "it is the time for mr to destroy the hope" ?
I can not even say it was our hope.
End of that time I know itsit's been my hope.

And you,
You betrayed my time.
Betrayed the time that made memories.
Betrayed memories that linger in my minf forever.
I know I will have this ache till the last of ky breath.
Until that time you will nevet know.

One day, this girl will know you.
She will know how you hug with your arms tighten my waist around.
She will know how you like to drink red winein the morning
She wiowill know how you smile between hard situation
She will know how you like her to lullaby you when you are in bad mood
She will know  how you want to be hug when you're going to sleep

She will know things that I've known
She will know every inch of your body
She will know your touch
She will know you

She will know things that I will miss

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I always asking about Who am I. What's life and what for. I never know who I am and it makes me know that I never know the other. And finally, life is all about pain. And the pain is about the process. Life is how, not what.